Friday, February 24, 2006
Certainly beats the Great Train Robbery
In Briatain, the heist of 50 million pounds certainly beats the measly 2.3 million pounds of the Great Train Robbery and is the largest heist in history. Cash. And where is this large sum of cash going? The heist is still in the old tradition, from the Telegraph: Just as importantly, the criminals themselves had begun to realise that conducting armed bank robberies - or "going over the pavement", to use the underworld's parlance - was far less lucrative and more dangerous than the drugs trade. As one Flying Squad detective put it: "What's the point of going over the pavement with a shotgun to rob a couple of hundred thousand pounds when you can make 10 times that from a consignment of drugs? You'll get anything up to 20 years for armed robbery - life, if someone gets killed - whereas the average drug conviction might get you six or seven." And perhaps the cash is difficult to handle within the UK:When robbers carried out a raid on the Northern Bank in Belfast in December 2004, they found much of their haul rendered useless after the bank introduced a new-style note. Yet if they can get it out of the country it would be a bit more useful, London Times: Speaking at a press conference before the arrests, Mr Leppard, who is leading a team of 100 investigators, confirmed that police were looking at the possibility that the gang had fled across the Channel. Officers have already seized security camera footage and computer numberplate records of vehicles going through the Channel Tunnel and on the Dover ferries after the raid early on Wednesday morning. Hmmmm. "military precision" |
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Dick Cheney being considered for a Medal of Freedom
(from my email) WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice-President Dick Cheney the Medal of Freedom, the nation's highest civilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney. The source was quoted to say, "All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another and Cheney actually had the guts to do it". In a related story, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters, wishing to bag a lawyer, to have the new "lawyer's stamp" on their hunting license. Currently Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer, and bear, at a cost of $7 annually. The new "lawyers stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long. The department further stated that although the "lawyers stamp" comes at a hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate annual revenues in excess of $3 billion dollars the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting stamps. ***** San Francisco might look better and better to some folks. They would have to stay inside The City limits, however, since hunting is quite popular north of the Golden Gate. |
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
The 4 things meme . . .
I have been tagged by Teach at the Pirate’s Cove with the 4 Things meme. 4 Jobs I have held in my life Accountant Exercise jockey Nursery school teacher I.R.S. intern 4 places I have lived Burbank, CA Gaithersburg, MD London, England Pocatello, ID 4 TV shows I love to watch Night Detective (BBC) Midsomer Murder (BBC) Um . . . Mythbusters Oh! and the Mail Call guy on History Channel. 4 places I have been on vacation Mt. St. Helens (helicopter ride around the inside of the caldera!) Hill hiking in Scotland To Seattle by “Coast Starlighter” for the Seattle to Portland bike ride Pony riding, Wales 4 Websites I visit daily NY Times London Times LA Times Jerusalem Post And, time allowing, all my friends in the side-bar! 4 favorite food Rare steak and mushrooms Good Thai food Hot curry – Vindaloo Stilton cheese, apples, Scotch (Laphroig) 4 places I would rather be right now On my horse, in the hills – the desert is pretty this time of year, maybe Mojave Portland, OR, in Powell’s books, drinking a mocha, reading trashy romance Provence, France in the sun, enjoying the scenery A quiet sunny beach, waves rolling in, hot sand, and . . . 4 Favorite movies (at least at the moment) Shakespeare in Love Pirates of the Caribbean Princes Bride (I know, I know) Monty Python Meaning of Life 4 new suckers to tag Jess at Life or Something Like it Daisy Cutter Ken is a Verb Catfish over at the Texican Tattlers (would tag JR but he’d just be grumpy…) |
Monday, February 06, 2006
Monday funnies, still resorting to email humor.
I have spent WAY too much time on airplanes. The drone of the flight attendant lecture was mind numbing. Then a few years ago on a Southwest Airline flight there was a new patter from the attendent. He was hilarious. OK. OK, now I'm listening. I have heard #3 on the list, as well as, "Please don't leave your children behind, we don't want them either."Airline cabin announcements: All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported: |
Friday, February 03, 2006
Friday funnies. . .
1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car." --Author Unknown 2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children." --Author Unknown 3) "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." --Drew Carey 4) "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house." --Jeff Foxworthy 5) "If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base." --Dave Barry 6) "Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp." --Bob Ettinger 7) "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'" --Paula Poundstone 8) "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh." --Conan O'Brien 9) "Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery 10) "I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni 11) "If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." --Johnny Carson 12) "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez 13) "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld 14) "Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?" --Warren Hutcherson 15) "Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde 16) "Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress... But I repeat myself." --Mark Twain 17) "Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown 18) "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." --Billy Crystal 19) "You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'" --Dave Barry 20) Do you know why they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was taken. --Unknown, presumed deceased (I'll be back soon, its just that accountants tend to be really busy this time of year.... Darn day job!) |
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
A little help for my friends
Being liberal, I think I'll give this guy a hand out, or something . . . |